Want to help children eat better? Partner with their parents.

Are you challenged with helping children eat better?

If those children are not your own, you must partner with their parents to ensure success.

In this blog series, I am sharing the key principles from materials I created with a Team Nutrition grant that was titled RECIPE for Growing Healthy Children. Now that these materials are no longer in print, this series makes this valuable content available again.

In the first post, we covered R, which stands for Role Model what we want children to be, say, and do.

In the second post, we covered E, which stands for a mealtime Environment that encourages children to practice healthy behaviors.

In the third post, we covered C, which stands for Create delicious and nutritious meals and snacks.

In the fourth post, we covered I, which stands for Involve children in food and fun.

In this post, we will cover P, which stands for Partner with parents. This segment of the workshop was not in the original plans until we surveyed and interviewed the childcare providers and they asked us for help in reaching parents more successfully.

Parents are critically important, as it says in the participant workbooks:

Parents can enhance your nutrition and education efforts if you give them information and support. Listen to their needs and provide them with tools and encouragement.

What follows shares key content from the Partner section of the training manual used in the workshops for childcare personnel.

What makes parents easy or challenging to work with?

This part of the workshop opened with a discussion in which the childcare providers described characteristics of parents that made them easy or challenging to work with.

Parents described as difficult are those who are always late to pick up their child, forget their forms, don’t want to get involved, complain about everything, or make demands that are unrealistic. We agreed that these parents need extra compassion and patience.

Parents viewed as “easy” are those who attend meetings and events, come in and help with special projects, read their newsletters, remember permission slips, and show up on time. Providers wished all parents were like this. But they are not. If they were, the providers wouldn’t have asked for help working with parents.

To begin our discussion of how to work with parents -- ALL parents, easy and challenging -- we made a list of common values parents share when it comes to raising children and parenting.

What does every parent want?

• Happy, healthy, smart, successful children. 

• To be seen as experts on their children. 

• To be seen as doing things in their child’s best interest. 

• Parenting to be easier. 

• To be good parents with strong families, and to get better at parenting. 

We encouraged childcare providers to recognize parents for what they are doing well and to help parents overcome their challenges and meet their goals.  In other words, partner with them!

Next, providers discussed the following list of ideas for communicating more effectively with parents. In small groups, they discussed their experiences with these ideas as well as generated others to try.

How can we successfully communicate with parents?

• Always act happy to see parents (all parents), smile and greet them warmly, call them by name, and get to know them.

• Communicate often with parents about their children.  Give them lots of encouragement.  Parents are stressed and need help with doing the best job they can. 

• Thank parents when they help, are on time, participate, etc.  Recognize them often.

• Share the parents’ needs and concerns – ask parents to tell you – and listen to them.  Provide ways for parents to share concerns on a regular basis – in writing or verbally.

• If a parent complains, respond rather than react.  Here’s how: 1.  First, ask them for more information.  Allow them to fully voice their complaint, providing as much detail and as many examples as possible.  In a calm, caring, concerned voice, say something like: “Please tell me more… “  “Can you be more specific?” 2.  As they describe their complaint, be an active listener and express your concern.  Do not attempt to defend yourself.  Extend an apology if needed.  3.  Ask the parent for their input in solving the problem by asking questions such as: “What would you like to see happen?” “How should we resolve this?”  “In your opinion, what should be done?” (Consider how much you are being a positive role model by reacting this way!)  4.  If you cannot meet their demand, explain calmly that you appreciate their point of view and provide the reason for your policy/procedure/etc.

• Invite parents to participate in a “Parent Advisory” group or council.   Meet regularly.  Give them opportunities to not only learn what is going on and stay informed, but to truly “advise” the operation of your program.

• Send home invitations to visit your center often; once at the beginning of the year is not enough.

• Parents may feel hesitant to volunteer – ask them to help in very specific and non-threatening ways.  Come up with a list of really easy things parents could do to help.  List the parents who help in your newsletter for public recognition.

• Ask a warm, friendly staff person to call parents occasionally on the phone to get their ideas and opinions.  Open the conversation with an update on how well their child is doing.

• Schedule parent meetings at convenient times.  Provide childcare.  If possible, provide a meal.

• Communicate with parents in many different ways:

  • using handouts, newsletters, on the back of menus… 

  • put up bulletin boards or displays 

  • have a suggestion box 

  • post announcements and/or have a blog on your website

  • call them on the phone

  • talk with them at drop-off and pick-up

  • have parent meetings 

  • have a regular day for them to come in and eat a meal or snack with their child and/or help in the classroom

Group discussions ended with watching a video showing teachers and parents discussing ways to partner with parents. This was followed by one final activity in which the childcare providers selected one or more ways they could communicate with parents about one of the topics listed below, which were ones the providers told us parents ask about most regarding feeding their children. Providers were provided with additional resources to assist them in meeting their goals.

What concerns do parents express most about feeding children?

The following list includes the main concerns and questions the childcare providers told us parents have, as well as the information they would like to be able to share with parents:

• What the children eat – your menus Explain why children are served what they are – meal patterns and portion sizes, timing of meals and snacks

• Information about nutrition and/or about specific foods

• Quick, easy, and inexpensive recipes for meals and snacks to make at home

• “Picky” eating – what if child doesn’t like what you serve at childcare, and how to handle at home

• Food allergies and special situations, how this is handled

• Family style service – how and why used, how to implement at home – manners and skills learned

• Conversation starters for family meals

• Eating out healthfully

What’s coming next?

RECIPE is almost complete. Only one more section left, E. What do you think it stands for? Check back next week!

“At the end of the day, the most overwhelming key to a child's success is the positive involvement of parents.” ~ Jane D. Hull

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